The Boiling Crab

The Boiling Crab is really a no-nonsense place; there are no dishes or utensils. You get a bag filled with your seafood of choice, sauce, and various add-ins. Everything you order, except fries, goes into the bag so it's all drenched in that wonderful, flavorful sauce.

Since seafood is charged by weight, I recommend getting shrimp--you get more meat for the price because the shell is lighter than that of crab or lobster. You have a choice between four sauces: cajun, garlic, lemon butter, or all three mixed together ("The Whole Sha-Bang"). We all got the latter, because why pick between three great things when you can get all of them? I highly recommend getting the sausage and corn, which come in the bag. The sausage seems like an odd addition, but it's moist and not too salty, and goes really great with the sauce. The corn, on the other hand, I wish I got more of. It's just the best corn on the cob you'll have, soaked in cajun butter garlic sauce.

Sorry I didn't take more pictures; once you get your hands
dirty, there's no going back.

The key to being dignified here is to realize that this is not the time nor place to be pretty. You have to wear machine-washable, dark-colored clothes. You must tie your hair into a tight bun--use as many bobby pins as you need; it should not be able to move. And you should probably not wear makeup, because juices and sauce will most definitely fly into your face. I made the mistake of wearing a full face of makeup and a red sundress, and I walked out with sauce on my arms and cheeks.

I love that this place doesn't just have great food, but is also an eating experience; there's nothing more memorable than eating with your hands and getting shrimp juice in your eye. The Boiling Crab is best when you go with a small-ish group of people with a good sense of humor; do not go with high-maintenance girls. Guys should only bring a girl who will peel her own shrimp.

The Boiling Crab
http://www.theboilingcrab.com/
Various locations

Blue Water Grill

First of all, I need to apologize for the food pictures taken with flash--Blue Water Grill is one of those pretentious NYC restaurants that is too cool for proper lighting. However, this restaurant would make for a really great romantic date spot, since all your flaws are hidden in the dark.

Our appetizer was the fried calamari with zucchini and chilis, which was my favorite part of the meal. The calamari was perfect--so tender and not greasy at all. The batter was a little less crispy than I would've liked it, but the texture of the calamari itself makes up for it. If you can take spicy food, try the fried red chili! They deseed it anyway, so it's not really that spicy.

In general, I would call Blue Water Grill inconsistent. Just on one plate, you get a mix of good and mediocre elements. I got the scallops, shrimp, and gnocchi. The scallops were nicely seared (a bit too opaque in the center, though), the gnocchi had a great fluffy texture, but the shrimp were rocks--literally rock shrimp. I mean, it was just cooked to death and hard and crunchy.

The lobster mashed potatoes were, again, mixed. The potatoes were so nice--perfectly smooth and buttery--but the lobster, which sat on top of the potato, was cold by the time we got it. I was also really confused by the single cilantro and tarragon leaves just floating on top; nothing agitates me more than nonfunctional garnish. I understand that color and presentation are important factors in a dish, but they could've used a garnish that both looks good and makes sense, flavor-wise. I expect a lot more from a BR Guest restaurant, especially when I'm paying $12 for a tiny plate.

I didn't even bother taking a picture of the profiteroles I got for dessert, because they were covered in chocolate, and under flash they would've just looked like mounds of poo. So basically you get three cream puffs without the cream, with vanilla ice cream, strawberry compote, and chocolate. The profiteroles were really, really not good--the puffs themselves were dense and dry, the ice cream was crunchy and grainy from all the ice crystals, and the strawberry compote had a strange, bitter aftertaste. I'm usually never this disappointed with dessert. When I think of profiteroles, I think of moist, airy puffs, and I got the opposite. I would be a lot more forgiving if Blue Water Grill just called it brioche with ice cream.

I'm not sure if the chef just had an "off" night, because BR Guest restaurants have a really good reputation; however, for the price point, this was really a disappointment, and I would have to think long and hard before coming back.

Blue Water Grill
http://www.bluewatergrillnyc.com/
31 Union Square West, at 16th St.

Luke's Lobster

My friend and I have been talking about eating here for over a semester, and we finally came on a less-cold day.

We each got a lobster roll and I got a clam chowder as well. It's a standard, simple lobster roll; really fresh lobster with butter, mayo, salt, and pepper. But even better than the lobster, I think, is the bread. It's so nice, buttery and toasted. I just wish that they would toast both sides, though (they only toast the outside), because if you don't eat it fast enough the inside can get a bit soggy.

The clam chowder was pretty nice--not the best one I've ever had, but it's good (my trip to Boston last year really ruined a lot of seafood for me). It's not too overly thick or salty, and the clams don't have that "fishy" taste. I did bite into a few grains of sand, though.

I don't know about the other stores, but the one in East Village is really, really tiny. It has nine seats, but because some seats are awkwardly cramped into corners, it can only really seat five or six people. It's a great place for two or three friends to come during the week (on weekends, people really cram in there and will eat standing).

Luke's Lobster
http://lukeslobster.com/
Various locations